Child Development

Am I good?

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“Rewards and punishments, to speak frankly, are the desk of the soul, that is, a means of enslaving a child’s spirit, and better suited to provoke than to prevent deformities.” Maria Montessori

Students will ask for my judgement or approval regarding their art, appearance, and behavior. My goal is for students to develop the ability to look for themselves, making their own evaluation. So my response to their questioning is usually a return question such as:

What do you think?

Do you like the work you did?

Do you think you did good?

In regards to behavior, children are often hard on themselves. I may remind them of positive points to help them balance their own evaluation. If there is some thing in their behavior they see was disappointing I may say something to the effect of “We are all learning at school” and ask “What could you do next time?” A child seeing themselves as bad does not serve their progression. Why should they try if they always fail? They need to see that they can choose to learn new ways of acting in which they achieve the results they want for themselves. They need to experience the success of evaluating their own behavior, choosing a new behavior and feeling good about that choice. In regards to rewards, this is their internal reward from inside themselves, which surpasses any sticker or sweet treat.

Simple facts and truths

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photo“This is our mission: to cast a ray of light and pass on.” (p. 111, para. 2)

Thoughts after read 7. The Exercises “How a Teacher Should Give a Lesson: Comparison with Older Systems”

The Montessori teacher provides simple lessons for the child. Every word in the lesson is thought out to provide factual information to the child with a limited amount of words. Too much information can be distracting and can take the focus off the purpose of the lesson. The teacher’s desire should be to spark interest and wonder in a child. If the lesson excites the child they will get the material out and work with it without being asked.

Maria describes situations in which a teacher will go on and on about their lesson to the child reaching beyond what they need to know. The child may become confused or get stuck in the story, never understanding the true meaning of the lesson. Maria gives the example of a traditional teacher teaching a child about the shape of the square. This teacher goes on about how many sides it has and the number of corners, making the square much more complicated than it has to be. In the Montessori Classroom this would be as simple as pointing at the square inset and tracing it with your fingers stating, “This is a square.” Maria points out that in this simple lesson the child is not even required to count to four. In this simple and precise manner, the child is not confused and understands the purpose of the lesson.

The teacher should be a rainbow to a child, gently casting light on lessons for the child to learn, opening them up to desire to reach their own understanding. Then the teacher fades back into the background while the child explores on their own. It is a beautiful dance in the classroom to watch, the teacher floating around the room casting light about her students encouraging them to sparkle from inside.

Montessori, M. (1972). The Exercises. In The discovery of the child (pp. 106-112) New York: Ballantine

Montessori Fundamentals: aesthetics, activity, control of error and limits

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“The training and sharpening of the senses has the obvious advantage of enlarging the field of perception and of offering an ever more solid foundation for intellectual growth.” (p.99, para. 2)

Thoughts after reading: 6. The Material for Development

The classroom itself is organized and aesthetically pleasing to the child. Having a beautiful environment for the child calls the child to work or activity. It also helps them develop a sense of care and concern for their environment. They water the plants, dust the shelves, sweep the floor, straighten books, and place objects where they belong. They feel that their classroom is their own and they are proud of the care that they give to the classroom. Children want a sense of belonging.

Montessori materials help prepare a young mind for science. The materials teach the child about order and categorization. Each sensorial material isolates a single focus for the child such as weight, size, length or color. If a child is using a material in which color is the focus contained needs to be the same. Everything else about the items in the exercise must be the same. Touch pads look the same, but have different textures. Color spools are all identical, but have different colors. Bells are the same, but have different sounds. After the child does the work, they must be able to self correct, using their own reasoning to identify their own mistakes and make their own corrections.

Limitation is key in the Montessori classroom. Not every student can do the same activity, but choose for themselves work that is available. If another student is using what they want they have the choice to observe, wait or select another activity.

Montessori, M. (1972). The Material for Development. In The discovery of the child (pp. 99-105) New York: Ballantine

Focused Movement in Practical Life Exercises

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“One single idea runs through every complex activity, and this single idea must be sought as the key to any general problem. There is also a secret key to the perfecting of the most varied types of movements. And the key is balance.”

Thoughts after reading: 5. Education in Movement (Part 2)

For the young child perfecting movement is important in developing control and mastery over their bodies. The implementation of practical life into the classroom allows the child to practice repetitive movements that help them conquer daily challenges in life and develop habits which can last them a lifetime. During my Early Childhood teacher training, I was amazed at my unrefined movements. I have always rushed through life, diving into the next thing, often bumping into coffee tables, spilling drinks, and walking heavy footed. Learning to slow down and pay attention to small movements to show the child was great practice for me. One of my favorite lessons is how to shut the door. I had never thought about this simple task beyond opening and shutting. The lessons shows the child how the doorknob works and how to turn the knob so the bolting mechanism go inside as the door is shutting and gently releases when the door is in place. The task is successful when the door closes without a sound.

Other activities practiced in practical life could be buttoning, zipping, latching, pouring, using locks and keys, opening containers, walking around obstacles, carrying objects, shoe tying, blowing noses, washing hands, washing a desk, polishing shoes, and much, much more. If I had been a Montessori child and practiced perfecting practical life skills, my adult life would be much easier. My clothes would last longer, I would experience less injuries, I would move about quieter and I would not have to redo tasks. Taking the Montessori training did help me slow down and appreciate each movement that is related to a task and appreciate the child’s efforts to perfect their own movements.

Montessori, M. (1972). Education in Movement. In The discovery of the child (pp. 88-90) New York: Ballantine

Allowing children to help is essential

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“Even the littlest children are anxious to do something and are more anxious to exert themselves than those who are older. A good teacher will therefore look for some way in which even the tiniest child can be of help.” (p. 84, para. 2)

Thoughts after reading: 5. Education in Movement

Every child seeks to be useful and part of the community. The youngest ones are the most eager to help. We should not discourage their interest in helping us. Their desire can prove more useful than we can imagine and the benefit to their soul is tremendous. Given tasks of importance makes them work very hard to perform to perfection. The trick is to not guide them so directly that their independence is replaced with puppet strings. The other thing to remember is that a little task can mean a lot to a child. Tasks in which they can gain that internal reward of accomplishment are very important.

“Of itself movement is something unrefined, but its value increases when one attempts to perfect it…. When children experience pleasure not only from an activity leading towards a special goal but also in carrying it out exactly in all its details, they open up a whole new area of education for themselves.” (p. 85, para. 3)

I am in awe of my own children’s organization skills. Perhaps their own time spent amongst Montessori materials organizing and sorting succeeded in perfecting their own sense of order.

My youngest daughter put together packets of information for me at work. She organized each part of the packet, counted their parts to insure the right amount, and created a process of assembling. Even at the age of 10, she was excited and enthusiastic about helping. I allowed her to create her own process and allowed her to accomplish it on her own. I believe this contributed to her own feeling of success.

After the first day of school, my eight grade daughter came home and made a plan regarding what she we would need for each class and how many trips she would need to go to her locker. She plans ahead for assignment and sets goals for herself beyond what the assignment calls for. I never have to worry about her not finishing her work. Although I watch her progress, I can see that she does not need me to assist with her planning and her results of success are indeed her own and not mine.

Montessori, M. (1972). Education in Movement. In The discovery of the child (pp. 76-88) New York: Ballantine

Embrace your maternal instincts!

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“Maternal instinct” is thus a generic definition given to the guiding instinct that is concerned with the preservation of the species. It has certain characteristics that are common to all living creatures. For one thing, it demands a sacrifice of all other adult instincts.” (p.201, para.5)

Thoughts after reading Part III: 28. Guiding Instincts

Montessori describes the deep sacrifice made by other creatures on behalf of their offspring; the bird build a nest, bees build a beehive, and spiders become intimately attached to their egg sack. Their instincts guide them to give their offspring what they need at the perfect time for their development. Yet as adults, we try to mold the children to fit into our adult world, instead of creating the nurturing environment they need in order to grow, “He acts as a butterfly would act that would break the cocoon of its larva to encourage it to fly. Or he acts like a frog that would draw its tadpole out of the water so that it might breathe on land….” (p.205, para. 2)

We may not be able to perfectly sacrifice ourselves as other animal species do for their children; however, being aware of our selfish tendencies can allow us to open our eyes to the child’s perspective and make changes that could benefit our children . A child needs an emotional and physical environment that is suitable for their development. As they grow and change their environment also needs to shift to support those needs.

Montessori, M., & Costelloe, M. J. (1972). Introduction, Childhood: A Social -Problem. The secret of childhood (pp. 199-206). New York: Ballantine Books. (Original work published 1966)

Letting the child do for himself

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“Our concept of the education of children thus differs not only from those who do everything for a child themselves but also from those who think they can leave the child in a purely passive environment. It is therefore not enough to prepare objects for children adapted in size shape to their needs: adults must also be trained to help them.” (p. 198, para. 3-4)

Thoughts after reading Part III: 26. The Instinct to Work

The Montessori teacher helps the child perform tasks alone and they are trained to observe the and guide the child based on their individual needs. It is a disservice to prevent a child’s natural growth and development. Children need to act for themselves in order become independent adults who can learn, think and act for themselves.  When the action is accomplished the child is elated and their confidence blossoms. When they are interrupted they may feel discouraged to try again or they may become too dependent on the adult to do for them.

Before jumping into assist the child, take a few minutes to watch. If the child is having difficulty and asks for help, try to model the action for them in distinct and easy to follow motions that they can copy on their own. Try to be patient and do not rush the child as they try to perform the task. If the child seems intent on their task, let them continue to work on it on their own. If they accomplish the task entirely on their own, they will experience intrinsic reward of accomplishment.

Montessori, M., & Costelloe, M. J. (1972). Introduction, Childhood: A Social -Problem. The secret of childhood (pp. 185-198). New York: Ballantine Books. (Original work published 1966)

Desire for work

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“A child’s desire to work represents a vital instinct since he cannot organize his personality without working: a man builds himself through working. There can be no substitute for work, neither affection nor physical well-being can replace it.” (p.186, para. 1)

In a Montessori environment the child develops internal motivation that leads to pursuit of occupations that they enjoy. Although the child is performing educational and developmental tasks, we should acknowledge that this is their work. The child’s occupation is to develop and the materials in the classroom environment are designed to give the children the freedom to work.   A Montessori child may become an adult driven towards selecting occupations that they enjoy because they have had the opportunity to explore a multitude of disciplines, self selecting areas in which they desire to know more about.

As adults, when we do what we love it does not feel like work. As a society we have attached negative feelings towards work as if it is some kind of drudgery; like a child, we should have a natural desire for work  and working should give us a  source of satisfaction.  Working because our work is enjoyable leads to a happier life.

Montessori, M., & Costelloe, M. J. (1972). Introduction, Childhood: A Social -Problem. The secret of childhood (pp. 185-189). New York: Ballantine Books. (Original work published 1966)

Embracing the child inside

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“If physical, mental, and nervous diseases that afflict adults can be traced back to childhood, it is in the life of the child that we notice the first symptoms.” (p.184, para. 1)

My father told to me that as an adult I am the same person that  I was a child. Each day I try to acknowledge this pure part of myself that is free of judgment or expectations.

Life experiences are unavoidable and impact the child, creating obstacles in their natural development. In therapy, the counselor often helps the patient reconnect with their “inner child.” Maria reminds us that as children, many of our issues developed from experiences we endured. Ripples of consequences from events of our youth influence our adult mind today.

As a teacher and a parent we must strive to do our best to cause positive ripples in children’s’ lives. Embracing the child in myself, helps me relate to children because I am making an effort to see their perspective. Taking the time to relate to the plight of the child is worth the results. Showing understanding and partnering with them on their developmental journey is the best gift you can offer.

Montessori, M., & Costelloe, M. J. (1972). Introduction, Childhood: A Social -Problem. The secret of childhood (pp. 183-184). New York: Ballantine Books. (Original work published 1966)

 

Deviating off the path of development

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“Experience has shown that normalization causes the disappearance of many childish traits, not only those which are considered to be defects but also others which are generally thought to be virtues. Among the traits that disappear are not only untidiness, disobedience, sloth, greed, egoism, quarrelsomeness, and instability, but also so-called “creative imagination,” delight in stories, attachment to individuals, play, submissiveness, and so forth.” (p. 154, para. 1)

Maria lists deviations which cause a child to depart from their “primitive plan of development.” A deviation is something has pulled the child off the path of development which they would naturally be drawn to follow. In these instances it is in response to the adults in the child’s lives influence, which is often not purposeful. Understanding these deviations can help us assist the child to return to his intended path.

Fugues: Fantasy play is often encouraged by adults. We relish the fantasies of children. Places like Disneyland are magical places to escape the realities of our own world. For some children the fantasy world becomes a huge distraction of activities that lack a purpose and does not develop concentration except by the way of fantasy. Santa Claus, Easter Bunny’s and Tooth Fairies are fun for the parents, but don’t ground our children in reality.   I have always been honest with my children about what is real and not real. Now that they are older, they appreciate having been told the truth.

Barriers: There are many adults that still carry barriers from childhood caused from childhood experiences relating to education. I hear adults say things like “I’ve never been a good speller” “I’m terrible at math,” or “I can’t draw.” Regardless of their intelligence, they have managed to build barriers in response to a teacher’s judgment of their capacities.

Attachment: Children need to be able to develop a sense of self instead of learned helplessness. When a child attaches themselves to close to an adult, they seek to have the adult direct them and help them in everything. This is also hard for the adult because they become like a slave to the child.

Possessiveness: Maria says that if children have not developed a natural attraction to their environment to develop their senses they are attracted instead to things, trading in love for possession. Some children are collectors, taking and storing things, even if they have no use or value. It is important for the child to reach a higher regard for nonmaterial things and to respect other’s property.

Desire for power: The manipulative child will use adults to get what they want, until the adult has nothing left to give. The child sees the adult as a source of fulfilling their wants and desires. The adult, again like a slave to child, gives and gives until they realize that their child has become spoiled and it is nearly impossible to correct. As difficult as it is, the adult should not start this unhealthy path by submitting to the child’s every whim.

Inferiority complex: The child may develop inferiority complex should he be constantly interrupted or not allowed the opportunity to complete a task. Children develop confidence through completing activities. When children are placed below adults in their ability to do or face constant correction, they feel as though they can’t do it. The child does not want the humiliation with constant correction and would rather refuse to perform an activity requested.

Fear: We want to protect our children from any harm or danger. Although our own fear is understandable, do we want to instill fear into our child? In a Montessori classroom, you will see children using knives to cut as part of a practical life exercise. The child should develop prudence, to know how to avoid danger without holding them back from developing life skills. Instead of being told not to touch the knife because it is dangerous, the children are shown how to use the knife in a safe manner.

Lies: Lies are often told as a camouflage for something else. A child may say something that they really believe is true, they also say something because they want it true. Children also tell untruths in order to defend themselves in a reflexive nature. Adults should not shame children who lie, but try to understand why the child is lying. If they are trying to defend themselves from us, we should try to create an environment where the truth is okay.

As a parent or teacher, we should recognize these deviations if they manifest in a child.  We should examine the way we interact with the child and see what we can do to help him find the way back to his natural developmental path.

Montessori, M., & Costelloe, M. J. (1972). Introduction, Childhood: A Social -Problem. The secret of childhood (pp. 154-176). New York: Ballantine Books. (Original work published 1966)